“Go on!!!!” I say. My face hurts from grinning.
“Okay, so” Zach continues their story. “We’re sitting in the pool with these girls. And, like, I haven’t said anything. But people can SMELL that I’m queer.”
I burst out laughing again.
Twenty minutes before, I’d warned my mum that I might be very quiet for the next hour. She was visiting, but I had to ignore her for a bit while I did a Zoom call with a storyteller for my online storytelling show.
(In Toronto and wanna come to it? It’s tomorrow night, details HERE)
“Usually the first hour with a storyteller is pretty serious” I told her. “Don’t expect to hear anything from me for a while.”
What actually happens is that, exactly thirty seconds into the call, I start HOWLING with laughter, and pretty much haven’t stopped since. Zach, my musician (or, in this case, musical theatre grad) storyteller, is a RIOT. Their story is about a trip they took with a best friend at age 18, where they met some new people who became instant friends.
“So, the girls start saying to me, ‘Oh my god, you’re BEAUTIFUL, you’re going to have a wonderful time, they’re going to be CRAZY over you.’
“And I was like, ‘No, it’s never happened to me, and it’s not what I’m particularly interested in. I’m here to have fun with my friends’—”
“Wait!” I interrupt. “Was that… true? Because it sounds an awful lot like when I was at summer camp age 12 — before I figured out I wasn’t just into boys — and all the girls started playing kiss chase. But instead, I decided to beat the boys up. I said it was what I wanted, but actually I was just too terrified to try the kissing part. So… were you really not particularly interested? Was that true?”
Zach says, “It’ was a BOLD. FACED. LIE. Are you kidding??? I had been at the resort watching all these people getting guys!! Girls around me were getting with the resort-workers! Everyone was having it!
“But when you grow up in a world where white/cis/able-bodied people with killer bods are the standard of what’s attractive, it was obvious to me. Who I am wasn’t enough. I was taught not to expect much. I’d never had a sexcapade—”
[Cue more howls of laughter from me]“—of any kind. Why set myself up to be ultimately disappointed??”
“THAT.” I say. “That is the most important part of your story.
“Yes, all the having fun and going to a club and being in the sun is fun. Whatever’s about to happen is going to be fun. But that part right there is what’s going to connect with almost everyone listening.
“Because maybe we’ve never been a queer 18 year old on vacation alone for the first time. But I bet you money that almost EVERY SINGLE PERSON in that audience is going to have had some kind of experience of thinking, ‘that’s not for people like me.’ Whether it’s a kind of job, or relationship, or a shape of family or even a fashion choice. That crushing feeling that something about you is too inherently broken or unloveable to be allowed this wonderful thing that everyone else gets to do.
“So if you can say that in your story, ALL of us will feel less alone, and like maybe, just maybe, we’re actually ok.”
I’m telling you this story for two reasons:
1) So that when you think about the stories you tell (eg in your presentations and keynotes), you make sure to include those parts. The parts where you felt a little bit a broken, that you know everyone will relate to.
2) To encourage you, if you’re in Toronto tomorrow night, to come and hear some stories that have these same relatable parts (7:30pm ET, tomomorrow aka Tues Nov 26th). FREE ENTRY! Five storytellers each tell a ten minute true story that i’ve coached them on. Also on the line up is TikTok superstar @spencer2thewest! Wanna come? It’s happening at The Garrison, 1197 Dundas W @ Ossington, doors 6:45, show 7:30, latecomers admitted very quietly! More details here.
Wanna watch Zach’s story? Here:
Thanks so much for reading! Tell me… have you ever heard a story that’s made YOU feel seen in that way? Let me know in the comments below!
You rule!
xx (Yes Yes) Marsha
PS Want my free guide to the magic bullet for captivating storytelling along with free coaching on storytelling and writing captivating presentations? Come and join the Yes Yes Family — it’s FREE! Just pop your details in below and I’ll ship the guide over*:
*you can unsubscribe whenever you like because, clearly, I am not the boss of you
Leave A Response