Shy, Going To A Party and Feeling Nervous? TEN TIPS

I GASPED AWAKE.

After three seconds of confused, soft stillness, everything caught up and my headache came crashing in.

Squinting at the clock – it was 11:30am – I tried to piece together what was going on.

Oh yes. The Christmas party.

I was 22 years old and very, very hungover. The night before…

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Why Your Shyness at a Party Is Actually A Secret Superpower

Harry Nilsson was wrong. One isn’t the loneliest number. It’s three.

When you’re shy, at a party and standing with two people who are talking to each other as if you’re not there, that’s how it feels.

In the summer of my second year at university, I had my first ever experience at a professional radio station. I hadn’t actually applied – an exceptional man called Lenny Love (real name!) had heard my show on student radio, paged me (remember how it was the 90’s?), then invited me to come and help out. (As my introduction to both radio and stand up comedy, this irrevocably altered the course of my life).

I was part of a 40-strong team working on Radio Forth’s coverage of the Edinburgh Fringe – the largest arts festival in the world. All day, we’d charge about watching shows or manning ticket giveaways. In the evening, we’d have a big production meeting, then sardine into the on-air studio for the main program: a three-hour, late-night spectacular, crammed with features, reviews and – most thrillingly – guest stand up comedians, who’d leave us asthmatic with laughter and almost taken off the air…

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What Most People ACTUALLY Think Of Your Conversation Skills

When I tell people about the restricting experience that I had for a lot of my life, they often say exactly the same thing: “You! Shy?? No way! I just can’t see it.”

Even though their surprise is more statement of fact than compliment, I always get a little happy bristle. For so many years, I felt like I was behind a glass wall when I went out to places. My friends would all chat away to new people, but I stayed mute.

These were friends who knew that, when it was just us, no one could shut me up. So as well as feeling deep frustration, I got to feel some shame and humiliation.
*awesome*

The reason I never spoke to them wasn’t 80’s-inspired Stranger Danger. It was usually because…

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