Want a Shortcut to Being Charming? Here’s One.


I have to be honest with you about something:

I am inherently lazy. Nobody believes me, because I’ve always got a million things on the go. But whenever I get the chance to fast-track something, or cut a corner, I am IN. Sorry for tarring you with the same brush, but if you’re like me (and if you’re enjoying reading this blog, there’s a good chance you are like me), then I’m assuming that:

you are inherently lazy too. And if you are: good news.

There are some FANTASTIC ways to cut corners when it comes to networking and getting people you think are rad to like you. For example:

(1) Become really good at remembering people’s names (along with their kids’ names; their spouses’ names; their dogs‘ names). If you’re terrible at this, don’t panic! I have a free guide for how to do it – that will, honestly, change your life – here: yesyesmarsha.com/names.

(2) Get good at storytelling. More on this below.

(3) Etiquette

ken doll nakedIt’s surprising how effective this is. My friend Chris excels at it. And, even though we’re the kind of platonic friends where I like to imagine he has a Ken Doll Situation going on ‘downstairs’ (see photo), whenever I’m with him, I get all giggly and flighty and feel GREAT. It’s all down to the etiquette, which is almost always wildly successful.


To explain what etiquette is, why it matters – and tell you a wonderful story about a time it didn’t quite go as planned, here’s Chris Ryan Graham, speaking at my Toronto show, True Stories Told Live:

Want a shortcut to being instantly charming? @yesyesmarsha has one right here: yym.ca/etiblog

(Tweet this HERE!)

If you loved this story, have a story of your own to tell, but have NO idea how to get it down to a compelling 10 minutes (or 20, or 3, or even thirty seconds), I’d love to help. Hop over to here, to find out how: yesyesmarsha.com/storycoaching.

Over to You

How do you feel about being on the receiving end of ettiquette? Do you prefer to drop the pleases and thank yous? Or were you (like me) brought up to believe POLITENESS AT (almost) ALL OPPORTUNITY?

Let me know in the comments below!

Thanks so much for reading. If you know anyone who either hates or loves these kind of gestures, who you think would enjoy this story, you can share it with them using one of the round buttons below.

You rule!

xx (Yes Yes) Marsha



PS want to know my best-ever client secret – and get even more advice, tips, plus stories that I won’t put on the internet? Come and join the Yes Yes Family – it’s free! Just pop your details in below:

stories and secrets that I won’t put on the internet.


Photo credit for Ken Doll: uberculture via Compfight cc


  • Elyse

    Reply Reply June 18, 2015

    Ha, he’s incredibly charming!

    I’m a big fan of etiquette, unless it’s forced, awkward, or overdone… then I’d rather not. In general, it feels like someone is taking extra care when they reach out of their way to help or acknowledge you for something you’ve done.

    Also, I’ve noticed as I get older I like it more and more. ;)

  • Julia

    Reply Reply June 19, 2015

    Chris!!! Chris Hoooorse! So spectacular. So scintillating. Truly. Twinkling like a fucking STAR! I want him like I want a box of the most bodacious bon-bons – because they are so DELICIOUS, especially to share. French cuffs. Waistcoat. The politics of restaurant seating. A few choicely dropped f-bombs. I agree with him completely. As Colette said, “It is wise to apply the oil of refined politeness to the mechanisms of friendship.” Now I’m so thoroughly crushed on him that I would, naturally, go entirely Silent Mary were I to ever be in his august presence :).

  • Sam

    Reply Reply June 19, 2015

    Such a funny story!! haha
    I love me a bit of etiquitte.

    Also, I am so lazy, but I want my life and business to be amazing.
    The struggle is real.

  • Loved this. So interesting. “It’s a subtle way to let people you know you’re thinking about them.” I agree with that theory.

  • Becky

    Reply Reply June 22, 2015

    Oh dear – I think I’m too fussy when it comes to manners. I love when I feel like you’re being polite because of ME – but if I feel like it’s just a routine that’s pulled on all the ladies – forget it. That said, I THINK I have good manners but….isn’t that what everyone says? All in all, delightful story!

    • Marsha (Yes Yes Marsha)

      Marsha Shandur

      Reply Reply June 22, 2015

      Dude, i TOTALLY feel you. But I think that’s the genius of etiquette properly delivered – it somehow doesn’t feel like it’s a routine, but genuine courtesy.

      Glad you liked the story, thanks for dropping by!


  • Tamsen

    Reply Reply June 23, 2015

    I love how he said that manner is just saying you care because that’s how I feel. There’s many “etiquettes” that I’m glad have gone by the wayside but there are so many that I hope stay around forever!

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