Exactly What to Say When You Walk Up To A Stranger at an Event
Within my career to date, it was the bravest move I’d ever made. Or maybe just the scariest.
Part of me couldn’t believe I was about to say this – to a TOTAL stranger. Someone I’d never spoken to before.
And at one of these events!
The kind I knew I should be at, but was terrified of. I’d only gone because my buddy Steve had said he would chum me. Then he got held up at work, but I hadn’t discovered this until I was outside the door. And I figured…well, I’m here. And I really need to meet some of these people.
After what felt like HOURS (but was more likely five minutes), I made the decision to do it. I spotted my target… walked up. And SAID IT…
When it’s OK to Walk Up To A Stranger…And When It Isn’t
I’m pretty sure it’s because of six year old girls that we all fear this.
You know the deal: you’re in the sunny schoolyard. You skip up to your two friends, excited to tell them the FUNNIEST thing that Stephen Henderson just did by the swings – when they turn to you, one of them screwing up her mouth, then saying,
“Sorry. Private con-ver-saaaation”.
Crushed, you slink away, feeling the hot burn of humiliation in your chest.
I actually don’t remember a specific incident where this happened, but the fact that imagining this scenario just now has given me such a visceral, physical shame reaction, tells me that it definitely did.
When you’re in a crowd – even if it’s a networking event or a conference, where protocol says it’s totally fine to walk up to strangers and introduce yourself – knowing who it is and isn’t ok to approach can take you right back to that hot summer afternoon.
What if you walk up and start talking – and they give you…
How to Stop Acting Like a Total Weirdo Around People You Want to Impress (VIDEO)
A couple of months ago, I got to meet one of my heroes. Someone I think is AMAZING. The first bit of the encounter – when there were lots of others around – went alright.
Then I tried to talk to her one-on-one.
Before I knew what was happening, I was acting like – well, basically, the opposite of how I wanted to come across. Lots of spitting. Laughing too hard. Almost as if I was trying to make her dislike me.
Sadly, it’s a way of behaving that I know all too well. Happily – I’ve learned to give this condition a name – and some steps to get rid of it.
Is this something you’ve experienced?
If so, in today’s video, it’s my pleasure to introduce you to…
How To Get Out of an Awkward Conversation – Without Being Offensive (VIDEO)
A little break from the norm: usually, I write and make videos about how to get on well in any networking situation. Especially, how to have conversations that are actually interesting and fun – even a short chat with a total stranger. My clients and readers have had successes with this stuff, at everywhere from art shows to blind dates.
BUT
Recently I keep being asked, “What do you do when the conversation you’re in dries up? How do you get away?”. Almost every new exchange has its life span – and you might need an exit strategy, even from ones you’ve enjoyed.
So, I made you a video – with a script – for these exact situations. It features a cameo by an A List celebrity. I don’t want to give too much…
The Reason Why It Doesn’t Matter What You Look Like
You totally know the kind of guy I’m talking about. Girls do this too, but my most recent experience of being on the receiving end of it was with a dude. My Irish friend Jonathan is a singer. Tall, with masses of brown hair and a deep voice, he’s effortlessly charming and impossibly…
How To Get Anybody To Talk To You
“I find it frustrating because I know exactly how you feel”, I told her.
She shouted back,
“If you know exactly how I feel, then you should leave me alone!”,
She slammed shut her bedroom door.
My plan had gone horribly wrong
I was 19 years old and in my first year of university. Jenna was my flatmate.
In that warm way that sometimes happens, she and I had bonded within seconds of meeting.
I always like to think of that as your souls bumping.
On this particular night, we’d been out at the local student bar with my sparky friend Alice. I’d engineered it, wanting these two beloveds of mine to spend some time.
The evening was awful.
Whilst Alice chatted away, Jenna…
The Weird Belief I Used To Have
Looking back on it, the guy in the bowler hat almost certainly fancied me. But at the time, I thought he was talking to me for a completely different reason.
I was 15 years old, in a warehouse in East London. Techno music and strobe lights filled the room. Two of my best friends were dancing nearby: hot pants, tight tops, arms trailing through the air in front of them. I danced, facing the wall, long sleeves pulled over my hands, shuffling to the music, trying hard not to be seen.
The guy in the bowler hat (it *was* the ’90s) came up to me and started asking me questions about myself. I don’t remember what they were. All that I remember is…
My 10 month old Niece Is Teaching Me How To Network.
Right now I’m in Thailand, visiting my brother and his baby. She’s pretty bloody cute. I know everyone thinks that about their sibling’s offspring, but look at this. Ridiculous, right? (that’s her going on a boat trip, just rolling with things) We talk a lot. Well, I talk a lot, whilst she sort of…
