How to Combat Facebook Envy (and Save Lives)

Last week, you learned what happened when guest poster Sage Tyrtle disabled her Facebook account. But for those of us who can’t or really don’t want to, we’re left with the problem of how Facebook can make us feel crummy about ourselves.

Here’s how to combat that (transcript below):

Transcript (NB, I don’t actually swear in the video):

We all walk around, all day every day, thinking that everyone else has their sh-t together.

(Click HERE to tweet that)

We all think that everyone else has a normal background, and normal parents, and a normal, successful career and successful relationships.

Then we get on Facebook and it compounds it. “This person’s getting married!” “That person has a happy family with kids!” “this person doesn’t have kids and so they went on vacation to Costa Rica!” “That person’s making six figures in her business!” – and it just COMPOUNDS that feeling of, “Everyone else has their sh-t together but me.

That feeling is shame. And what shame does, is builds this metal fortress around you, cutting you off from everyone else.

But then, someone stands up and tells a vulnerable story – and it’s someone who, at that point, was just a person walking around the room, whom you assumed also has their sh-t together. Or maybe it’s your business hero! Or maybe someone who’s written this story in a blog!

And you think, “Hang on – if they don’t have their sh-t together – maybe it’s ok if I don’t have my sh-t together!”
It CONNECTS the two of you. And connection is the *antithesis of shame – it walks up to that metal fortress and just disintegrates it.

But also – you think, “If THEY don’t have their sh-t together… and I don’t… then maybe NOBODY does!”
So it connects you to EVERYONE!

As humans, we’re WIRED to connect! We need it to survive! So, by telling your vulnerable stories, you’re KEEPING PEOPLE ALIVE!!!!

Which – and I don’t say this in the video, but – as well as being a really important thing in terms of being of service to the world, is also a bloody great marketing technique. Maya Angelou taught us that “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did – but people will never forget how you made them feel”. If how you made them feel is like THEY’RE NOT GOING TO DIE, well, that’s pretty memorable.

In the interests of proving that I, too, don’t have my Shhhh together, while filming this video I:

  • realised when watching it back that my right ear was poking out of my hair in a weird way

  • worried that that bra in that dress makes me look matronly

  • part way through, almost choked on my own spit

Thanks so much, for reading. Do you agree with me that this is how we keep people alive? Let me know in the comments below! And if you know someone else who’d like this – maybe someone whose story you KNOW needs to tell their story, you can share it with them using one of the round buttons below.

If this has inspired you to tell your story but you want some help, I’d LOVE to do that. Have a look at

You rule!

xx (Yes Yes) Marsha



PS want to know my best-ever client secret – and get even more advice, tips, plus stories that I won’t put on the internet? Come and join the Yes Yes Family – it’s free! Just pop your details in below:


  • Jul's

    Reply Reply April 6, 2016

    I’ve been following you for a while Marsha, and you are just simply amazing! I love your videos, I love your stories and always have a laugh with each read or view because you are so warm, such a connector and very funny, so often bringing humor to the table. You Rock!

    • Marsha (Yes Yes Marsha)

      Jul’s!! What LOVELY things you say! Thank you so much!

      You really DID make my heart sing!!

      Thrilled to have you in the YYF :) xxyyM

  • Rachel

    Reply Reply April 7, 2016

    Yessss!!! I love this so much — it’s amazing what a strong physical, psychological, and spiritual effect connection has on us as humans. Fantastic post, as usual! xx

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